I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
