That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
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