69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
