Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Randomize
