I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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