I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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