make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Shame - the story of my life.
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