ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Randomize
