Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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