I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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