Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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