Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
