Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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