Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
