He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
