Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
