I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
