i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
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