Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
