look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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