Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
