dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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