just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
His nipple licking is glorious
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