: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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