You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
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