My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
