My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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