He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize