Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
