Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
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