i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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