Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
