I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Randomize
