I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
