That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks
this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed
he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?
messed up. what color are the wings?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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