we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
