I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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