Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize