no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize