He told me they were just razor bumps!
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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