Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
