Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?

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(325): View more from Texas

I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room

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(618): View more from Illinois

I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.

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(541): View more from Oregon

Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.

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(864): View more from South Carolina

turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy

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(573): View more from Missouri

Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me

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(804): View more from Virginia

I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex

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(541): View more from Oregon

Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.

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