This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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