Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
