All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
