So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
