I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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