kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
