he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize
