I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Randomize
